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Sunday, January 08, 2006
I drank too much last nights. Threw up. Made out with a cute guy with a little willy named Mike. Got ripped off a bar. Flirted too much.
Posted at 01:14 pm by GLAMOREX
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Saturday, October 08, 2005
Do I seem stupid?
The last few guys who have told me their IQs have done so in such a manner as to say "I'm smarter than you" and the sad truth is that they're not. They wear their IQ like a badge, clinging to the digits as if it legitimizes them. There's a slight smile, lips curved upward, eyes peaking with muted pride, and they think they're great. It's must give their ego a flutter to say it when underestimating the listener's IQ. I smile because I am sincerely impressed but also because they don't know I've out performed their results of an IQ test.
Posted at 05:57 pm by GLAMOREX
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Thursday, September 15, 2005
I'm bored
Posted at 10:17 pm by GLAMOREX
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Wednesday, September 14, 2005
I put on a friendly facade because he's paying for my college when in truth I'd rather not speak to him. It's going to take some time to forgive him for hiding me....or until he finally realizes it was wrong.
Posted at 06:01 pm by GLAMOREX
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Wednesday, August 24, 2005
You rock Paulo
Posted at 10:29 pm by GLAMOREX
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Saturday, August 20, 2005
I'm alone.
let down
On my birthday.
by friends.
Again.
Starting to wonder, starting to think almost positively that there is something unattractive to my personality. If it weren't for the consistancy of disappointment when ever I attempt to organize an activity relating to my self then I would unanimously believe that there wasn't something wrong, that there isn't something pathetic and weird about me that is the cause. But there must be.
Posted at 08:47 pm by GLAMOREX
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Monday, August 15, 2005
My birthday is this weekend and I haven't anyone to celebrat it with. Infact, I'm working my birthday weekend. :-( boo
Posted at 10:43 pm by GLAMOREX
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Thursday, August 11, 2005
I didn't mean to get drunk. When I got a text from Trevor asking me to meet him at Gus's I had only planned to to stay a few hours but I ended up pratically spending the night. Around six, Trevor's friend Dave took off leaving "DJ cuts" and I alone with nothing to but bar hop. We met up with another one of his friends, Mike, who is as big as house but is the coolest guy I've ever met. I didn't want to drink, but...that damn peer pressure. I was doing well until trevor just ordered me a drink and I felt rude if I didn't drink it. I had a cosmo, two beers, and some strange shots I can't even remember. Maybe peer pressure wasn't a big factor, free drinks may have been.
After sample what each bar had to offer in SLO and grabbing some food at Woodstocks, we parted ways. Trevor was taking me home when he asked if I wanted to see his 40,000 dollar show room. So I agreed. We got there, and to make a long story short, it was definately worth 40,000 dollars. The sound was fanastic and image was clear. It really was a mini-theater. So we start kissing and things got a little heavy but I'm being picking, I don't want to do anything mor ethan make out, especially with Trevor. While I find him cute, he doesn't have the body I like and at times the personality. While we're making out I'm imagining what sex would be like with him from the movement of his body and his hands on me. I think his experience would do him well but as far as stamina goes...err, not so good. Case in point...he crashed out when we were done and refused to take me home till 2:30 using some bs reason about the law and cops. Blah Blah bullshit. I had to go home, I had to be at work at 9 in the morning and it was almost 2. So I start dragging his fugly ass around the room, which to his shock, I was strong enough to do. Then I lift his torso up and just bug the fuck out of him to get him to TAKE ME HOME. I had to sleep, I had to wake up in five hours but he refused. I woke his ass up at 2:30 and by the time I got home it was 3 in th emorning.
that's the last mr. fugly will ever hear from me
Posted at 10:05 pm by GLAMOREX
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Sunday, August 07, 2005
My Palm reading:
- Career: The next year would be very good for me and I will have a part time job that will expose me to new experiences and situations, and dealing with people. What I will do for a career requires a lot of education and that it will have something to do with improving the lives of others because I make everyone around me happy. I will have a very busy life and accomplish a lot. There will be a point when I don't have to work but will choose to and my future husband will be fine with that independence.
- Romance: My husband will come from a good family that I will get along with and we will raise our children well because we're both traditional. Our engagement period will be very rough with a lot of ups and downs and at some point we will actually break up but realize we're miserable with out each other and marry, and those issues won't carry over into the marriage and that marriage won't end in divorce. We will build our own home in california but not on the central coast, rather southern california. :-X
- Misc.: I will have an even number of children, that if I have two kids and become pregnant again it may be twins. I will have a long life and probably live into my 90s.
Posted at 12:00 pm by GLAMOREX
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Sunday, July 31, 2005
My relationship with Frank is even more awkward after last night. We went out dancing to celebrate Emma's last weekend in SLO but she never showed up so Frank and I spent the whole evening together. The majority of the night I kept my distance when dancing, hoping that people (particulary attractive men) wouldn't think I was with Frank but after a beer and a strong long island ice tea on an empty stomach kicked in, I was a little bit more...affectionate. Frank knows what I'm like when I'm drunk and took advantage of my touchy-feely tendencies to put his arm around me. I didn't care. Normally I would have been "uber" careful not to lead Frank on and would have felt embarassed and self conscious when he pulled me close to him. It was still awkward so I diffused the feelings and situation with humor and it worked. However, when we got into the "club" (SLO doesn't have clubs, we have buildings with poorly DJed music and alcohol) we started to dance to the music and after another shot we started to grind to it. He would try looking into my eyes and his lips were thinly away, he wanted to kiss me and I could feel his hands try to pull me closer to him. But I looked away and dodged his stare, I didn't want to kiss him and I certainly didn't want to date him, I just wanted to dance.
At Denny's, where I texted 19 people saying that they were cool enough to text when I was drunk, Frank told me about the first time he met me and that when he saw me he thought, "this is the woman I want to be my wife and have children with." He went on to tell me how he's always wanted to be my boyfriend ever since I told him about my father and the coversation we had on The Infamous Drunk Night that I don't remember. My vulnerable moments were attractive to him and he told me he could never replace me, that he'd really miss me when I left.
UNFORTUNATELY...
I am in no way attracted to Frank in ANY romantic sense. I could list a million reasons why but I won't but I thought I'd inform you of the possibility.
On the way home he wanted me to hang out with him a little big longer but I could see where it was heading and told him I was too tired and I wanted to sleep.
Now, the day after, and knowing that Frank's attraction towards is me more than just a little crush, I feel that it has in some way ruined a part of our friendship I hoped we had. I imagined our friendship as non-sexual, where we could be comfortable enough to dance, hug, and even give back rubs, and not have it stir any romantic feelings. Most likeley those ideas about male-female friendship were pathetically false. I should have known that at some point hormones and exposure/contact with each other's bodies over time would eventually spark romatic thought and feeling. Perhaps purely plutonic male-female relationships don't exist. What saddens me is that I want to dance, hug, and and even receive back rubs from Frank but I can't because I have to send a message that I simply don't want to date him. I guess I need a gay man.
In other news...
I made some great chicken with rosemary, garlic, garlic salt, pepper, and a little bit of vinaigrette.
Posted at 07:45 pm by GLAMOREX
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